Coffee in the Bottle
By: Donna D. McCartney
Grandma slipped a little coffee in the baby’s bottle –
Just to see what it would do
It gave him super powers, super strength and super speed –
It’s true!
When Mom told me to watch him – I just watched him go
Running after his dusty cape, as he tried to escape
Grandma says next week he’ll enter the diaper derby
Crawling in record time, crossing the finish line
He’s a pooper trooper dropping bombs here and there
Mom changed his dirty diaper in despair
We all covered our noses as the stink hit the air
Grandma laughed when the baby climbed the tree
I didn’t because everyone thought it was me!
It wasn’t funny when the fire marshal came
I’m the one who always gets the blame
With a baby so strong, something must be terribly wrong
Finally when it was time for bed
He went down without the usual fight
Mom kissed his cheek and turned out the light
Before I go, there is one thing you should know …
Whatever you do, DON’T let Grandma put coffee in the baby’s bottle!